Please co-operate!

Some phrases have become so much a part of our life that nobody thinks them odd or out of place anymore. Here are a few that sometimes amuse and sometimes generate murderous tendencies in me-

1st prize - 'Please co-operate'!

This must be the most maligned phrase of our times, atleast in labs. Here is a typical notice for booking a common instrument (for which 10 people are breathing down each other's necks at any typical time)- 'The hood will be booked from 9 am to 5 pm, please co-operate'..nice try..

2nd- 'Paradigm shift'-

Someone please tell me what this means..

3rd- 'Chemistry' or 'Vibes'-

Someone actually told me once that maybe i didnt have 'good vibes with my labspace' which is probably why the lysate was contaminated!! Not that i m ignoring any possibilities, anyone in possession of vibe-restoring charms please pass them on!

4th- 'stay in the loop'

For some reason, this reminds me of those fancy hotel revolving doors that i m always nervous of!!

5th- 'They don't gel' (Maybe you should increase the agarose concentration..)

6th- 'Its all in the game' (which one? i m good at kho kho and bad at volleyball..)

After some days with an overdose of these ( a simple way to get it these days is to watch any newschannel for about 15 minutes) I was delighted to hear someone say 'Kindly adjust'('kindly', of course, gives it an added charm :) at Canara bank, it totally made my day. Its another matter that the consequence was that I had to go back another day, having misguidedly allowed sentiment to take over and let in a perfectly healthy looking young girl before me. but that's no big deal, its all in the game..

Geeky poem

After the second ligation and third transduction fail, one wonders..

The cell debris that earns a frown
Or P value that gets you down
The ice slurry that melts so fast
That competent cells they float full mast
The Streptococcus so cheery,
That Amp or Kan it makes merry
The enzyme assay that looks all nice
Until the blot satanically dries
The transfer apparatus that stops midway
Even when you remembered to pray
The ligation colony that is not a clone
Transforming ecstatic smile to heartfelt groan
The cells that thrive on a tryptone feast
Except on cross examination they turn out to be yeast
The PCR that only works on alternate weekends,
With prima donna moods that rival fashion trends
I wonder whether all of this, is on ‘entertainment E. coli ’
As a pick me up and comic turn for bored bacilli!

If its being broadcast on some bacterial underground network, I m sure no channel could compete with its TRP's..

wHIRLWIND mUMBAI

I was in Bombay for a whirlwind two and a half days visiting a friend, a combination of Madhu's enterprise and advance plans helped us exploit the time fully though! :)

I thought a photo collagey thing would be a better expression of the trip than anything I could write :) I cant seem to fit it into the blog post space so its just above this, as the main blog pic. So this has the sunset from Juhu beach, the rocky seafront at Bandra, bangles at Colaba causeway, the awessome chocolate brownie at Theobromas (apparently they deliver all over now, note!!),the posters at Prithvi theatre, the Bombay symphony orchestra at NCPA and the amazingly skilled elderly man at Prithvi's cafe who made(is making, in the pic) cheese pav bhaji :), the Einstein head from the National gallery of Modern art, the famous wall to wall Hussain frescoe at TIFR, and of course, us, at Bandra seaface cum mysterious fort..the writing was long gone so no idea what the fort is :)

I came away with the feeling of having stepped into a kaleidoscope..The bits of Bombay I met were friendly and efficient. And in the relatively upmarket areas, very aesthetic..cobbled lanes and houses as restaurants in every gully..Like a friend pointed out, probably Indranagar in disguise :)Of course the starkest contrasts between rich and poor are still probably here..the slums reside side by side with Ambani's bungalow..but I certainly felt that the eateries (damn expensive, thats definitely a downside :( score very high..amazing Parsi, Iranian and Italian fare that I can vouch for! They should have a Mumbai Michelin :)

And..I now know how much a glass of tea costs at the Taj- for those who dont- believe or not- its 400 rs. I mean, at that price I'd want the tea plant so generations could thrive on it!! We were so shocked (or I was:) and discussed leaving quietly in such an obvious way that I suspect thats what got us free chocolate cookies :))

food books

I think almost all food tastes better if had with the right book in hand. Of course the right company makes it very, if not more, enjoyable, but now I think about it, the taste buds get a raw deal. You re too busy composing the next answer or listening to soak in the food (assuming its worth soaking in of course- all beetroot and papaya related things excluded right now). But books are more passive, you can read, put them down, chew,savour, think and pick them up again. If you like some section you can saunter down that part, guess what comes next, and then do it all over again. As a side angle, eating with a book also draws far more attention than eating with any live person does. I dont know whether out of sympathy (paapa she doesn't have any friends) or curiosity, but everyone wants to know more about you the moment you re caught eating with a book in hand. In short, although vetoed as a bad food practice, I think theres something to be said in favour of book- eating too :)

So what are your favourite food books? Here is my list:


THE BEST: Wodehouse: I think the easygoing and mad happenings of Wodehouses stimulate gastric juices or something, I always eat more and feel happier with them!

Agatha Christie: Non gory, very gossipy and such a skilled character sketcher! great with food

Enid Blytons: Fabulous!Her food descriptions alone were enough to sustain a meal (fresh farm tomatoes, hot bread from the oven, and hot many other things I didn't even know the meaning of, but it didn't matter)

Harry Potter: The coolest,ALL Of them :)

Gerald Durrell: Feel good independently and with food, always

Also William, Rex Stout, Tintin but not Asterix (dont know why), Edith Nesbit. Don Camillo. Roald dahl- the non scary ones ONLY. Triveni (not the sad ones, again)

specific books : All Mma Ramotswe stories, Raga n josh, The microbe hunters. City of djinns.

THE WORST- P.D. James (the goriest murders ever, and you ll just sink into a dark mood)

the so so ones-

Ngaio marsh, Calvin (too restless I think?), actually comics in general are not great, except Tintin somehow..Frank o connor, Somerset maugham, Kuvempu (I think guilt. he s so scholarly and polished that you feel it cant be taken so lightly..feels like sacrilege).

Palace walk (too much detail to absorb) and The Kiterunner (too sad).

The WORST ever- Analytical chemistry- the Bangalore university prescribed one. I tried it once,obviously when in dire straits, and it put me off lunch AND dinner. It just gave me a hopeless feeling. Even the cover is especially unappealing, and am sure also unappetising, for poor foraging paper mites :(

Of course you cant insult the best books by reading them with sidey food..that wont give you any sort of good feeling. It needs quite a mix and match perrsonallized standardization..good luck :)

food for the soul and stomach :)

1) The most spirited rendering of the old favourite 'bhagyada lakshmi baramma' that I have heard. I re-heard it after years and cant stop..WHAT a voice, and what a simple powerful rendition of this simple classic!! I really felt like anyone would feel like granting wishes or coming instantly (lakshmi baramma!)hearing this !!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_tdYY6lUw9g

2) A guaranteed feel good full meal combination recipe

Cheese chapati with pickle, and cauliflower something rice (i havent decided what to christen it :)

Simplest way to make a cheese chapati-

Make two chapatis, grate cheese, sprinkle (liberally) on one, add the other on top, pat gently and put on the tava. don't try rolling it again though, if it doesn't break, it ll definitely push the cheese somewhere in the dough and the taste is quite different. Eat hot, and with lemon pickle for best mood lifting :)

The cauliflower something rice:

Cut cauliflower florets, keep soaked in salt water for half hour. Cook them with minimal oil, add just a pinch of asofateida ('ingu'- i can never spell the asof-..) and karben soppu/ kadi patta for taste (remove it later) also add haldi liberally, keep it covered and let it cook for about 20 minutes. Meanwhile saute finely chopped onions on the pan in minimal oil. Cut tomatoes in quarters and cut away the pulp so that only the dry seedless part remains.Take near-fully cooked rice (i used the regular, but basmati will be great), add a little oil in pan and toss around the rice till it browns. keep aside. mix the rice, cauli-tomatoes and onions, keep in pan and cook for maybe 5 minutes. if you like herbs, sprinkle basil on top (namdharis!) . i actually ate it with kadi patta chutney pudi..i dont want to boast but oh god it was delicious!! :)

the new year new age questionnaire :)

1) What do you have a natural gift for? (not a talent, just a character trait)

i) Guilting myself:

:) i was damn good at this even at the age of 8, when an (evil! grr..) cousin convinced me that my grandfather was going to be arrested because i had laughed so loudly..although way better now, i can still spend completely unnecessary guilted times, provided the guilter does a good logical job :)

ii)Seeing the lighter side of things:

this is a plus for me, but am sure can be dampening for others at times! it also means very little scope for reverence or belief about things without tangible proof of them. come to think of it, that can be damn irritating if stretched to its maximum. like my mother often says as a favourite exasperated statement 'for you everyone else is right' :) just the irritating habit of seeing all points of view leading to the conclusion that nobody is wrong..but luckily i take sides nonetheless, on principle :) also luckily, things like seas, books, mountains, children,music and rainbows exist, and can generate quite enough reverence to keep me in touch with the sentiment! :)

iii) Paranoia:

i still look under the bed every night..if i m not allowed i would sit up with a torch and get bleary eyed.

and any smart would be murderer would just have to lock me in a room alone with 'the ring' or its equivalent on autoplay...

iv) sensing emotion

I dont know how to describe this!:) but i could always tell even in school if the teacher'd had a fight at home in the first 10 minutes..and it always bothered me that nobody cared to be gentler with her that day :(

2) Do you like self help and 'designed to inspire' kind of books?

No. as to why..I think because I don't learn anything from them, and they don't evoke any feeling from me! like someone said, touches neither mind nor heart :) atleast the few i ve read i ve found either pretentious (meaning fairly obvious truths cloaked in fancy terms) or just plain uninteresting :(..i cant say a thing to anyone raving about the book 'jonathan livingstone seagull', for example! (though what a lovely name :) But i believe the category has expanded so i may be generalizing unintentionally. there are apparently more concrete ones written now, for instance with people's life stories..i havent tried them but atleast i can see that they must have some content, so should try..


3) What do you respect in people around you?

well of course thats a long list! But I think it d boil down to strength of character and a sort of tenacity. Strength of character sounds like a conveniently loose term :) but I mean it as some mix of sincerity, passion,interest,conviction and hard work. I think its a poor way to spend a life if done with a half hearted interest in what you do and in people and things around you. I m also among those who can unfortunately admire some facets of people, even if i dont like them (damn :) :)

4) What bothers you in people?

Lack of tolerance bothers me very much. Both at the personal and at the larger..for instance in evidence right now, country level. Maybe it partly stems of working in a field where variety is admired and is the basis for everything else.. I find it incredible that one cAN object to people doing things differently, instead of being happy to learn that there is one more way of doing it!

so does lack of sensitivity.

so does a sense of extra bhaav ( i prefer it to 'ego' :)..even the merited kind can be hard to take, the unmerited generates sand-pit ducking impulses in me!!

5) What are you bad at?

i) drawing

ii) accepting a compliment

iii) pretending

iv) Going to a bank or office and not fighting with a lady

v) Convincing the IISc security that i m a legitimate student here..

i would have added waiting in a queue but thats not true anymore! yay i ve learnt tons of patience :)


6) What are you bad at understanding?

i) An inability to laugh at oneself:

Somehow I think the rigidity born of this attitude diminishes anyone's personality :(

ii) Politicians and businessmen donating to temples in crores while letting schools and hospitals languish:

I have nothing against it being both, but in a country like ours I find it really sad that people with money to give often choose to soothe their own consciences apparently to wash away sin, while someone's life can be changed drastically with it. Thankfully I believe many places run associated charities, i hope they expand.

iii) Imposing your views or preferences on others:

Not happening!though a healthy argument is very much happening :)

iv) Many society driven 'ushoo's :) :

must be plenty such taboos, and some that i agree with by virtue of my own personality or upbringing or inhibitions, but a taboo that has no basis other than that someone has decided its 'bad' or immoral or whatever, carries no conviction with me..unless of course its proven harmful

8) What do you think is essential to growth (as a person)?

i) Travel! :)

ii) Interacting with people (like R.K.Narayan and Miss Marple have pointed out in two v different cultures, a village can provide as much scope as the world if rightly tapped :)

iii) A general willingness and effort to explore and accept

9) Are you good at forgiving people and yourself?

Yes! :) and no :(

10) Do you get enough exercise?

No.But am getting better in small doses!

11) Would you enjoy working in industry?

I doubt it v much..but I might like it for a short time, just for the experience. On the whole I m all for academics or any private freelancey thing for a sane balance of things in life :) not to say you cant get madly involved and slavedriving academics, of course you do! but if you re calling the shots you can arrange it your way in a quiet non madly competitive place, and have time to call your own :)

well thats a longish list..happy new year everyone! :)

Felix felicis :)

Felix felicis or 'liquid luck' is a potion that brings luck, and for the non Harry Potter people, it makes its appearance in the sixth book and gives the drinker a nice heady feeling with success in everything for some time period. It sounded a highly desirable potion (takes six months to brew) to me,it just made even stronger the case to not be born a muggle..But then I though about it, we don't do that badly in the non magic world either :)Here are my inevitable comfort and peace and happiness givers,and not all that hard to get, either! how different are yours?

1)Having a good hearty laugh about something ridiculously trivial

2)Meeting old friends

3) Dark chocolate. preferably hot! and particularly in sauce form with vanilla icecream and a brownie, or even just the smell will do (I can get high on cocoa)

4) Good food in general..particularly if associated with cauliflower, bhindi or cheese, and garnished with good company :)also good books in general

5) Good food with a good solid mystery or a good 'food book' in hand! Some books just go well with food, some, like Japanese thrillers, totally dont. Dont know why, probably just the styles..clinically precise and logical books are bad with food i ve figured, the best are slow paced or humorous (wodehouse, roald dahl and gerald durrell are all fantastic food books! )or should periodically talk a lot about food..like the enid blytons. It has to add to your enjoyment of cauliflower and tomatoes if you re reading about 'freshly picked tomatoes glistening with dew' :)

6) Looking at masses of Flowers- particularly tiger lilies, zerberas and the little purple ones..

7) Sleeping insanely late on saturday nights and getting up insanely late to the smell of chai on sunday morning..also an unexpected afternoon nap when reely reely exhausted but virtuous :) (like if you ve wrapped up some work or feel satisfied with something)..i ve read that people feel cheered up waking up with the sun..would be nice, say twice a year :))

8)A good movie in a relaxed environment..best with company, but could be fine alone too, depends on the movie also :) (I wouldnt dare watch something like 'the ring' by myself)

9) Shopping for books and clothes :) books anytime, rest has to be after some months of respite, then works like a charm. it also helps if you re looking for something for someone else and find the perfect thing

10) Hearing or telling stories..this should have come higher up

11) Watching rain..nothing like a thorough downpour to wash out all low feeling :)

12) Clinching an argument with that ace that nobody had thought of :) this is a total cheap thrill but rare enough to be looked fwd to!! :)

13) Playing with children young enough to be fond of things like hide and seek and ignorant of dvds and facebook..that is if they still exist :)

14) Unwrapping a gift

15) getting a compliment. actually getting a compliment secondhand. that way you get the pleasure minus the embarrassment :)

16) Listening to the kind of music that always gives me goosebumps or tears or a high, depending which.. in general for upliftment i d pick mozart, kishori amonkar, paluskar's bhajans, some by the beatles,violin by M.S. Gopalakrishnan and flute by N. Ramani.but definitely also the sound of rain, chimes and laughter :)

must be plenty more, but these atleast should give felix a run for his money!